New Year's Resolution - Oh the Cliche!
In a nihilistic moment last December, I made a New Year's resolution not to make a New Year's resolution. After all, what was the point? I know myself enough to know that self-discipline is not an easy part of my character. I would make a resolution on January 1st and by January 8th, not only would I have broken it I may not even remember what I had resolved. A "study" reported on a radio talk show said that 80% of people who make New Year's resolutions break them by the end of January.
This year, I find myself a little wiser and a little less cynical. I still struggle with self-discipline, but I know that it needs to be part of my character. I think the problem with most New Year's resolutions is that they attempt to change our personal weaknesses into strengths in one fell swoop. I have a lot of experience trying to conquer my personal weaknesses. I "conquered" my "evil tongue" while I was in college. Well . . . sort of. I still swear a blue streak when I think no one is listening. Some day, I'll get caught and my embarrassment will bring me back to reality. Maybe "stop swearing at video games and frustrating household objects" will be my New Year's resolution for 2006.
Change is possible, of course. It's just difficult. After all, I used to swear quite frequently and quite publicly. Now at least I am embarrassed to do so. I have made great progress. I have made progress in other areas of my life as well. Perhaps the problem with New Year's resolutions is that they are usually too extreme. They expect complete change to happen immediately. Perhaps a more realistic view of New Year's Day and other opportunities for new starts is in order here.
Such a realistic view was offered on Relevant Radio (http://www.relevantradio.com/) by Dave Durand (http://www.davedurand.com/, http://www.probalance.biz/, http://www.livingcatholic.org/), a Catholic expert on time management who has truly "bridged the gap between faith and everyday life" (the slogan of Relevant Radio ). Dave talks about creating a life mission statement, a statement about who you want to be - who you discern God wants you to be. Dave suggests that we then make small, attainable goals based on this mission statement. He also suggests that we revisit these goals two or three times a year, not just once on New Year's Day, to assess our progress on attaining them, and to assess if they are still relevant to our life mission.
New Year's Day is the perfect time not only to create new goals for our year, but to assess the mission statement for our lives. My life is currently centered around my vocation as a husband, and my avocation as a teacher. So, after much thought and reflection, here is my life mission statement (for 2005):
From this mission statement, I will create two or three small goals that will contribute to my mission. Instead of my usual "I will pray three times a day, conquer this sin, and clean the house once a week so my wife doesn't have to," which would be futilely attempted for a period of three days and then dropped in frustration, I will try some more manageable goals.
This year, I find myself a little wiser and a little less cynical. I still struggle with self-discipline, but I know that it needs to be part of my character. I think the problem with most New Year's resolutions is that they attempt to change our personal weaknesses into strengths in one fell swoop. I have a lot of experience trying to conquer my personal weaknesses. I "conquered" my "evil tongue" while I was in college. Well . . . sort of. I still swear a blue streak when I think no one is listening. Some day, I'll get caught and my embarrassment will bring me back to reality. Maybe "stop swearing at video games and frustrating household objects" will be my New Year's resolution for 2006.
Change is possible, of course. It's just difficult. After all, I used to swear quite frequently and quite publicly. Now at least I am embarrassed to do so. I have made great progress. I have made progress in other areas of my life as well. Perhaps the problem with New Year's resolutions is that they are usually too extreme. They expect complete change to happen immediately. Perhaps a more realistic view of New Year's Day and other opportunities for new starts is in order here.
Such a realistic view was offered on Relevant Radio (http://www.relevantradio.com/) by Dave Durand (http://www.davedurand.com/, http://www.probalance.biz/, http://www.livingcatholic.org/), a Catholic expert on time management who has truly "bridged the gap between faith and everyday life" (the slogan of Relevant Radio ). Dave talks about creating a life mission statement, a statement about who you want to be - who you discern God wants you to be. Dave suggests that we then make small, attainable goals based on this mission statement. He also suggests that we revisit these goals two or three times a year, not just once on New Year's Day, to assess our progress on attaining them, and to assess if they are still relevant to our life mission.
New Year's Day is the perfect time not only to create new goals for our year, but to assess the mission statement for our lives. My life is currently centered around my vocation as a husband, and my avocation as a teacher. So, after much thought and reflection, here is my life mission statement (for 2005):
My primary mission in life is to live in holiness, to reach heaven, and to help
my wife to attain holiness and to reach heaven. I also use the charisms
and gifts of teaching that God has given me to lead others to the Truth and to
holiness.
From this mission statement, I will create two or three small goals that will contribute to my mission. Instead of my usual "I will pray three times a day, conquer this sin, and clean the house once a week so my wife doesn't have to," which would be futilely attempted for a period of three days and then dropped in frustration, I will try some more manageable goals.
- Get up 20 minutes earlier and pray Morning Prayer each morning
- Take one step toward replacing one of my "pet sins" with a new virtue (can you tell I'm being evasive here?)
- Make time to pray with my wife before we go to bed
These seem manageable. The trick will be to assess if they are really happening, and to make adjustments if one or more of them seems to be falling by the wayside (perhaps by taking a smaller step). Dave recommends putting these goals into a daily calendar and sticking to the schedule. These goals are central to my life's mission, so they should take priority over most other concerns on my daily schedule. This process makes a New Year's resolution a continuous process of self-analysis and progression toward perfection. I'm going to give it a try. Next year, we'll see if Dave's advice worked for me.
Have a happy New Year - may God bless you with many graces!
Labels: virtue
posted by Jeffrey | Friday, December 31, 2004
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