Being a Parent Means Taking Responsibility

Children are eating more junk food and who is to blame? Advertisers, apparently. Check out this quotation from an article in U.S. News and World Report:

USNews.com: Selling kids cereal with sugar and toys

Harvard psychologist Susan Linn calls it "running the gantlet"--negotiating supermarket aisles filled with products heavily marketed to children. Today, in the face of a huge increase in childhood obesity, kids are bombarded by an unprecedented avalanche of food advertising. Indeed, food marketing aimed at children increased from $6.9 billion in 1992 to $15 billion in 2002.

The question I want to ask is, "Why does the advertising work?" Here is a clue:

"What the marketers want to do is get kids to nag their parents for the food, for the toys," says Linn, associate director of the media center at Judge Baker Children's Center in Boston. A 1998 study on the "Nag Factor" showed that 1 in every 3 visits to a fast-food outlet was attributable to children's begging.

Here's another question. Why are parents allowing their children to become victims of advertising rather than teaching them the virtues of prudence and temperance? If television advertising is brainwashing our kids into thinking they need to eat unhealthy foods, shouldn't we control the television they watch and teach them how to analyze advertising? If our children's appetite for sugar and fat is increasing, don't we have the obligation to say no to them? Don't we have the obligation to make them eat healthy foods?

How can the virtues of prudence and temperance help? Prudence is the ability to discern the greatest good and to make a plan to attain it. In this case, the greatest good would be the proper, healthful use of food. Helping children to grow in virtue would mean teaching them about good health, about the dangers of too much junk food, about the ways advertising tries to attract their appetites, and how to develop eating habits that allow for fun and health. Temperance is the virtue to help us balance our physical appetites. It helps us to enjoy physical goods and pleasures, including food, drink and sex, without over-indulging in them and without becoming slaves to our desires. This virtue is commonly known as self-control.

I know, it's not easy to do. My daughter is only 13 months old and I can already see that guiding her to virtue is going to be a challenge. However, I also know that I have the right and the responsibility to help her grow in virtue. Teaching prudence requires more than giving our kids lessons in healthy decision making. It also means being vigilant for teachable moments to give our children opportunities to practice good decision making. Teaching temperance means using discipline to help our children develop self-discipline. This means telling our children "no" firmly and consistently as we go through the "gantlet" and dealing with the wining and temper tantrums that result.

It's not easy, but it is our responsibility as parents. What is the consequence if we do not? We damage our children, and we damage our own identity as parents:

Before he ever saw children's commercial television, says Foster, Morgan ate multigrain cereal for breakfast with fruit juice to drink. "Now, I've had to buy Scooby-Doo Cinnamon Marshmallow Cereal with Scooby-shaped pieces," says Foster, "and when I ask if he wants milk or juice with dinner, he slips in, `I'll have a soda.' He was so excited when he found this new world of products. But for me," she sighs, "I feel like I've given in."

She had to buy Scooby-Doo Cinnamon Marshmallow Cereal with Scooby-shaped pieces? Why did she have to? What forced her? Her son? Who has the power here? Who has the responsibility? Who is the adult? As parents, we need to do a better job of taking responsibility for the well-being of our children. If we don't, then we will not only be giving in, we will be selling out.

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